The DiarJOURNAL of a McFlyer
by Sirius's Daughter
Summary: Tom Fletcher's private diary...I mean journal! Read it to see his skewed perspective on life, love, and fame.
1. Epitome of a Manly Manthat cooks

Me: Oooo, boy, this'll be good…Tom Fletcher's personal diary!

Tom: IT'S A JOURNAL.

Me: Whatever…

Disclaimer: I don't own Tom Fletcher or McFly. If I did, I would probably be off somewhere squeezing them until they were purple.

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**Some random day**

**In the year of…2007 I think**

When a guy gets a diary, does that mean he's gay?

I MEAN JOURNAL.

Anyways, for my birthday, our manager, Fletch, comes up to me holding this little package.

"I thought you'd like this, Tom," he goes.

So I'm thinking, _Awwww…_

I rip the paper off, and what do I see?

A LIGHT BLUE NOTEBOOK.

NOT…LYING.

Does Fletch think I'm gay!?

Oh HELL no…

I am not gay!!! I am the epitome of a manly man!!!

That…cooks…

Anyway, back to my question.

If a guy gets a (LIGHT BLUE) journal from his band manager, IS HE GAY?

I am not gay!

Just so you know.

You're probably wondering who's rambling on and on, aren't you?

…No, actually, you probably aren't, seeing as you're a journal.

Oh well. I'm Tom Fletcher, one of the lead singers and guitarists in the British band McFly.

You may know us. We were in the USA for about a year or 2.

THANK GOD FOR ENGLAND.

Um…not that I have anything against the USA…heh heh…

So…I am single…and looking…namely for Katie Holmes.

God, she's fit…

Oh damn, I'm drooling.

Anyways…maybe I should place one of those personal ads in the newspaper.

_Ladies looking for a famous guy who has no fashion sense whatsoever, call Tom Fletcher!_

Oh yeah, I'd get SO many responses…

Note my sarcasm.

Well…

If they noticed the Tom Fletcher part, then yeah, maybe I'd get responses.

Girls just go for the band…

Speaking of which, some girl asked me to marry her today. It made me glow inside to turn her down

I am so mean.

So…what should I talk about? Hmmmmmmmmm…

I am tapping my pen against my teeth.

Just an FYI.

If I had a beard, I'd stroke it.

Maybe Harry would let me stroke HIS beard…

Ack. That sounds wrong.

And it's more like peach fuzz, anyways.

So…maybe the band's life. That could be interesting.

Yeah!

Okay, so I'm in McFly (which I have established already).

We don't live together anymore, but we live close enough to wreak mayhem throughout the neighborhood.

Oh yeah, we're SO mature.

Note the sarcasm (again)

Anyways, we hang out and be completely weird. Just watch our 'Friday Night' video to see.

The police chase is ALL HARRY'S FAULT.

I'm listening to Green Day. The coolest band ever.

Aside from us, of course.

Oh yeah, I'm vain.

Anyways, I gotta go. Some creeps-I mean my band mates- are at the door.

A/N: little short first chapter! Yay! No, I didn't sneak into Tom's room at 12:01 AM on Monday, February 5th, 2007, steal his journal and a shirt, and then run back to my hotel! I DIDN'T DO IT!!!!!


	2. WHAT MAKES ME SO INTRESTING!

Me: I've got REVIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWS!!! YAY!

Tom: Help…me…

Me: ANSWER REVIEWS. NOW.

Tom: Fine…**Mrs Dougie Lee Poynter: **She has you hooked on my JOURNAL!? Is there no privacy in the world!?

Me: Calm down…thanks!

Tom: -grumble- Next, **xHeavilyxBrokenx: **My journal's more interesting than I thought…

Me: Thanks!

Tom: **twinkley-toes: **Everyone thinks its SO interesting…IT'S A FREAKING JOURNAL!

Me: Tom…

Tom: -grumble- **alcb: **She's only continuing because the court wouldn't give me a restraining order.

Me: TOM.

Tom: **ohemgee gurl: **We're updating…with another journal entry.

And, **biach-goddess-leah: **We're glad you like it too…

Disclaimer: I own nothing…except the plot.

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**Another Random Day**

**Year: 3000 (just kidding!)**

So…

Sososososo…

Nothing to write about. But DANNY is sitting there WATCHING ME.

FOR GODSAKE. WHAT IS SO INTERESTING ABOUT WATCHING A GUY WRITE IN HIS DIAR- I MEAN JOURNAL!?

Grrrrrrr…

Maybe he thinks I'm writing about him.

And I kind of am.

But NOT ANYMORE.

I saw a cute girl at this gas station.

DEFINITELY fit.

Just reading a magazine…

With us on the cover. She had a little heart around my head and I could see that she had scribbled (in large letters) **'PROPERTY OF THE FUTURE MRS. FLETCHER'**.

A bit of a turn-off.

So, still looking for Ms. Right.

Hey. If you're reading this, and you think you're perfect for me, raise your hand!!!

Ha. Losers.

I bet you actually raised your hands.

I CAN'T SEE YOU.

…

I sound really mean.

Dammit.

I hate my conscience.

Once, I had one of those "angel on one shoulder, devil on the other" moments.

Dougie was the devil, and Danny was the angel.

I went with the devil.

Well, if this journal falls into the clutches of a rabid fangirl, I should probably tell her that she's not for me.

What kind of girl DO I like, you may ask?

Well…you don't.

BUT I'M GOING TO TELL YOU ANYWAYS. HA.

So…

She CANNOT just talk about McFly. HUGE turn off.

She can wear anything, but I love just jeans and a t-shirt.

And she can't have our wedding cake, her wedding dress, and her bridesmaids all picked out on the first date.

That should wait for a few dates.

Or a year or two.

And she can't be foaming at the mouth.

I've met a couple of those kinds and they aren't really…fun to be around.

One of them bit our bodyguard once.

It was actually kinda funny.

But then she tried to rip my shirt off so she could have a souvenir.

That WASN'T funny.

Well…she WAS kind of cute…

AUGH. BAD TOM. BAD BAD BAD. BADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBAD.

So, any girls out there want to go on a date?

Anyone?

…

I'll take suggestions.

OH COME ON.

I'm not THAT bad looking!

Or am I?

Anyways, we're going on tour in the USA soon. But at the moment we're doing an up close and personal tour.

And some fans have tried to get TOO close.

Seriously. They have attacked our tour bus. And slashed the tires. And cracked the windows and stolen our clothes and tried to steal DNA strands and…

The list continues.

Ah damn.

Danny's staring at me again.

WHAT MAKES ME SO INTRESTING?!

Anyone know?

…

Anyone?

A/N: Okay! Second chapter-

Tom: ENTRY.

Me: Whatever. Done! Okay, any takers for being Tom's girlfriend? I'm open to suggestions! Just review or message me a description and I will decide! So REVIEW AND ALL OF YOUR WILDEST DREAMS WILL COME TRUE.


	3. STOP THE PUPPY EYES!

Me: YAY!! NEW REVIEWS!!. Tom, c'mere…

Tom: What…

Me: REVIEWSREVIEWS!!

Tom: Rawr…okay. First off, **Darkness Mystery: **bear in mind this is my actually JOURNAL…

Me: Sorry, he's just grumpy.

Tom: I AM NOT GRUMPY. Rawr… **ohemgee gurl: **I remind you of a BEAR?

**Mrs Dougie Lee Poynter: **FINALLY! Someone who UNDERSTANDS that it's a JOURNAL!

**xHeavilyxBrokenx: **And now ANOTHER knows it's a journal!

**Shealtiel: **Um, Shealtiel? Yeah, MY journal. Not gonna happen.

Me: Tom, be NICE.

Tom: Rawr…**twinkley-toes: **Um…you…kinda got a little bit off topic…

**Xelia Phyx: **Don't be angry…('cause you're scaring Sirius's Daughter)

Me: -cowers behind Tom whimpering-

Tom: Aye-yai-yai…**.xXGorgeousDorkXx. **She'll think about it

**aislingmonica: **What can I say? I was bored and listening to Busted.

…..I'm not saying this name.

Me: Tom…

Tom: f…fl…flet…**fletchermustdie:** Um.

And, last but not least, **Zanessa: **See, you're the only one who's reassured me that I'm not gay! Tom likes you!

Disclaimer: Do I HAVE to say it?

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**Yet ANOTHER random day**

**Screw the year, I'm ready for it to be over**

AUGH!!! AUGHAUGHAUGH!!!

Oh yeah, I am PISSED.

Know why?

DANNY CHALLENGED ME TO A PICK-UP CHALLENGE.

AND HE WON.

Don't ask by how much, it still hurts.

…

Don't give me that look.

No, I won't tell you!

…

ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT! JUST STOP THE PUPPY DOG EYES, I BEG OF YOU!!!

He won by….about 15 girls.

It…hurts…

Any sympathy is welcome.

Any at all.

Not just for the lost challenge, though.

See, I was flipping through the paper yesterday (YES, I read on occasion, stop pretending to faint).

And it turns out that SOMEone put a personal ad in it.

But not just for anybody, oh noooooo…

It was for me.

Now, normally, I would just laugh it off and chuck the paper at Harry's head (he confessed after I threatened them all to give them paper cuts-I am eeevil).

But see, this paper is about, oh, TWO WEEKS OLD.

And I JUST found out about it.

Oh yeah, that hurt my pride.  
Maybe I should just kill myself now.

…

Only joking.

…Where's my razor, I'm going to cut myself.

…

Not…working!

Maybe I should use something sharper than a straw...

Oh well. I still have my fans to live for, right?

Right?

RIGHT?!

…I need a girlfriend badly.

Maybe I should start praying or something, it could help. My parents said that that's what they did so that I would get into a band, and look where I am now!

…Don't answer that.

So, now that I've realized I need to get on the girlfriend hunt, what to write about…hmmm…

I'm stroking my chin thoughtfully

And Dougie's laughing at me.

Stupid Dougie.

He always laughs at me.

And…it makes me sad.

-sniff- So…painful…

It hurts me.

…

I think I need a hug.

A/N: Yes, short chapter. But everyone who wants to be Tom's girlfriend and has submitted a description! I want you to send me reasons WHY you think you should be his girlfriend! And they gotta be good reasons, too, not just "Cuz hes sooooo HAWT!" or something like that. Got it?

Tom: They've got it, alright?!

Me: Oh, shut up.

REVIEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!


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